Monday, December 26, 2011

Spiritual Roller Coaster aka LIFE

I tend to be a person that feels better about something after saying it out loud. Whether that benefits anybody but me I am still trying to figure out, but for the sake of what I am trying to discuss I believe there is something we all need to admit, and just get out in the open so that it can be dealt with thoroughly. Christians are in a daily war against a powerful enemy, and because of this war we go through spiritual ups and downs. Sadly we as Christians also forget the Commander in Chief of our side of the war is the most powerful Force ever, and we have but only to draw into God, and listen to his instructions to turn the tide of any spiritual battle. Now that we have the knowledge of being in a war, how will we respond? 
Just to give a little background on me, I grew up with a family that took me to church, and told me to believe in God. That was all well and good, but unfortunately for my parents I was a child that liked to know the “why” of the orders I was given. My parents told me I was hard headed and insubordinate for wanting to know why about everything, I like to think I am merely using my logical muscles! To my dismay however, this chasing of “why” also led me to try alcohol to learn “why” it is not okay to drink it, the same with drugs and figuring out for myself “why” they are not okay to use. (Oh how I wish “because I said so” would have sufficed on those two!). I say all that to say God saved me by His divine grace, and opened my eyes to “why” He is the way, and the truth, and the light. You see I had a dilemma with this order from my parents to worship God, I didn’t know how! The same principle applied with reading my bible. My parents told me to read my bible, but I didn’t know how (not in an illiterate sense, I just had no idea what the words on the page were saying). Also in my prayer life, I was told to pray, but I felt insufficient in my ability and therefore did not want to because I didn’t know how. Since God saved me he has set me on an incredible journey of uncovering the “why” and “how” portions of my walk with Him that I had never understood. We can call this finding the logic behind my worship.
So let us apply this to the before mentioned spiritual war we are in. Specifically I want to discuss the process of going through spiritual highs and lows. Unless your life is different, I have found in my life that I go through ups and downs in my walk. This often depends on the season the Lord has me in, and a lot of times it has to do with the most current events in my life. For example, a real spiritual low for me came during finals week this past semester. Every day consisted of hours of studying, and left no real time for me to get into the Word. Satan attacked me with all kind of concerns about school, relationships, insufficiency, and just sinful desires. He attacked me at a time when I was weakest, and tried to drag me as low as possible. I kept thinking “God what in the crap is going on? Please forgive me for these thoughts, this is not my desire my heart desires you Lord, please take this away!” Then God hit me with some truth, and made me realize a few things. It is good for me to go through this low because it helps me relish the good times! The lows also force me to cling, and depend on God for ANY sort of comfort and joy, which I think is what He wants from me ALL the time.  Psalm 119:50 says “This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.”  God showed me that it was a BLESSING to walk through what we’ll call a spiritual valley, where the forecast was not religious rainbows, but rather was met daily by a 100% chance of conviction, and what felt like isolated storms that God left me alone to walk through. This was not the case though. God revealed that He was glorified even in my own self proclaimed “lows”, that as my mentor puts it “everywhere, and everything is a training ground spiritually”, and that the best thing to do when my flesh was killing me, and my spirit felt weak is to THANK God for this time in my life. He showed me to PRAISE Him for valleys, because He is able to make something beautiful out of circumstances that we find less than ideal. Psalm 119:71 says “It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes.” Think about that; apply it to your walk. It is good for us to experience trials! It is a good thing to feel conviction! I fully believe that God has led me through numerous difficult situations so that I might be better equipped for my walk. I know that God will put me through various trials to build my character, test my faith, and show me marvelous things unseen! It is good for me to be afflicted, that God might be glorified in my ministry all the more through the wonderful things He reveals to me!
Now let me talk to my FCA campers. Going through camp is always an amazing spiritual high, but every time we get back home (yes huddle leaders included) we meet temptation and sin as soon as we arrive. We immediately think oh no, here comes this spiritual low, it’s just too hard to live this faith away from camp, does God not realize the sinful people there are out here to tempt me? We make the excuse about no time to read the bible, no time to pray, and there are no believers to fellowship with. Check it, Herschel Walker made time every day to do over 5000 pushups and 6000 sit ups while going to college, practicing football, and the grind that comes with college life. You wanna know why? Because being a football player is who Herschel WAS. He made time for the most important thing in his life because his identity was wrapped up in football. You see until your walk with Christ is WHO you are, and not just SOMETHING you do, you probably won’t have time to read your bible because your relationship with God doesn’t mean that much to you. If you claim to know God, you’ll make time to spend time with the Lord, and hopefully you’ll come to know Him in a way that you walk all day with Him. By the way, those pushups and sit ups would take hours a day; how can I say I don’t at least have time to have a quiet time? My advice to you is to look at leaving camp as not entering a spiritual low, but look at it as your entering a battlefield. Go to war daily against your flesh that tells you not to get in the Word, that tells you it is okay not to pray, and that says it is okay to fall back into sin. Prepare yourself for temptation in this way, Psalm 119:92 says “If your law (God’s Word the bible) had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction.” As I look at this verse it shows me that if David had not been reading God’s word, thinking about God’s promises, and reminding himself that He was in God’s hand he would have been destroyed by the sin in his life. So as we begin this journey of life after camp, prepare yourself with God’s word. Be unashamed of what God is doing in your life, and step out in boldness to follow Jesus!
Something also has to be said for walking through spiritual highs. I find in my walk that during spiritual highs I tend to coast. God starts doing incredible stuff, my quiet times become amazing, and life just seems good yo! So riding off of that I’ll just say “God you’re really doing your thing through me! I can just ride your coat tails, not read as much, and just chill for awhile. No need for me to press into you, I am spiritually full to the point you couldn’t fill me anymore, and I’ll hit you up next time I get into a spiritual low.” How sinful am I? Totally depraved. And now we are at a point where I cannot tell you the best advice on how to walk through the spiritual mountains in the Christian walk. God has magnificently shown me what not to do which is stated above, and He is graciously walking me now through the balance of staying strong in my faith, and clinging to Jesus when it is easy as well as when it is hard. For now I feel confident saying God desires ALL of my life. From the mountains to the valleys God calls me to find my complete identity in Him. He reveals to me daily something new and magnificent in His word; He beckons me to love people regardless how they act, and to be patient with people because He is patient with me. Jesus convicts me when I start to try and do things my way again, and calls me to repentance when I sin (daily).
 I want to conclude in this way; your life reflects what you are excited about. The thing that pumps you up the most is what people will hear and see in your life. True fulfillment will only come when that daily excitement comes from your entire life making much of God. Until your life is submitted before the Holy God that gave His son that we might also be called righteous, you will find no satisfaction, and that goes for people trying to do religious acts. You are not made holy by sitting in a church pew or even going to church camp. You are made holy by what Jesus did on the cross. Your debt for your sin was fulfilled on the cross, and as such the life you have been given should be fulfilled by the God that paid that debt.